Avoiding avoidance

Earlier today, I remembered a conversation I had some years ago with a younger friend. It was about some terrible situation they were facing at that time.

“I’ll stay on my lane. I’ll avoid everyone. I will avoid the world”, they told me.

“Fully incommunicado”, they called it.

I understand how tempting it can be to avoid facing a difficult situation. To avoid the pain completely. To wish for something different.

But reality is funny. It doesn’t conform to our perception of it.

At the end of our conversation, we opted for a different course of action. Accept the situation as if you planned it. Engage those involved to better understand their perspectives. Take action, only after you’ve understood.

That worked. I’m glad it worked.

When you can, avoid avoidance and seek to understand.